Tuesday, October 4, 2011

A River Runs Through It

I'm sorry if words are misspelled or misplaced but I've been crying for about an hour. A friend of mine told me I should read "A River Runs Through It" by Norman Maclean. I had seen the movie so we talked about it for a time and then I decided since fall break was coming up I would take the time to read it (haven't had many leisure reads since school started). It was worth it.

I feel, as a woman, I wasn't able to dive into the depths of the male understanding of life, nature, and the relationship between brothers as much as a man may be able to. Not that I don't ponder those things at equal depth, just in different ways. That being said, even though my mind doesn't work in the same way as Norman's, it adapted throughout the book and parts of me came out to meet these soul awakenings that I hadn't encountered before. This work is a "beautiful" mix of natural, spiritual, and familial elements that wake you up from some urban slumber. Sometimes a reading overwhelms me, I call my friends and tell them, then write it down somewhere.....welp, here we are....

I'll probably post about this again, I need to process.....

"I am haunted by waters." -Norman Maclean

-Katie Ro

Monday, July 18, 2011

Harry Potter

I don't know whether or not it's the charm of awkward Ron Weasley or the thrill of magic or the strong desire I have to be adopted by Professor Slughorn or to try butter beer BUT I am absolutely smitten with this whole Harry Potter situation, and have been for some time. I was having a conversation the other day with a friend of mine about authors such as Rowling, Tolkien, Lewis, etc... and how they not only have been accomplished fiction authors but they have created ENTIRE worlds from the ground up. It is such a powerful gift for an author to be able to completely build a world from scratch.....I mean give me chills.

I know the fantasy craze has become so huge, in part, because humanity wants to escape the reality of pain and fear and heartache......well count me in!!! Seriously though.....it is quite fun!

Alright I'm off to watch the Deathly Hallows pt. 1 in preparation to watch part 2 again.....sit back relax, eat your chocolate frogs and wave your wands....off to Hogwarts we go!

-Katie Ro

Friday, July 8, 2011

A Long Winter...

I think I lost myself for a while...

Sometimes we don't realize we're changing as its happening (no matter how self aware you are). One day you wake up and realize something is different about you. Something that you can't fix overnight like fingernail polish or a bad hair day.....deep roots that have pushed through the surface. This realization can be wonderful or really disheartening because true change is difficult to correct. If it is positive then you really can feel victorious and, quite frankly, awesome about yourself. Maybe you've conquered a fear you've always had and you wake up one day to realize that you're really not held captive by that anymore. Maybe something you've never liked or accepted about yourself has either evolved into something wonderful or you've learned to love who the Lord created YOU to be. These awesome, positive awakenings really make you hopeful. You find that you aren't always stuck in ruts where you feel unable to get out, sometimes you really do get out and improve and grow.

Then there are the dark seasons of the soul when you realize that time has passed by you and the aftermath has revealed changes within your being that you don't like. It's like the small pieces that seem harmless but when put together reveal something ugly and painful. These pieces weave together a tapestry of regret as the seemingly harmless situations unite to reveal something inside you that hasn't always been there and that you absolutely need to be rid of.

When I think about the past year of my life, I have a lot of small situations that make me regret not guarding myself or listening to the discernment of the Spirit. I jumped headfirst into situation after situation that left me hurt and insecure. So of course the logical response would be to enter the same situation yet again....with the same mindset.....

What's so crazy is that while I was passing through these similar situations I honestly didn't realize what was happening. Each time I found myself hurting I would ask the Lord the same question "why does this always happen to me?" Instead of waiting for an answer though, I moved on as quickly as I could to jump into something new that I felt would fulfill me. Only to feel the same in a matter of time.

Sometimes the Lord leads us through similar situations until we finally get what we need to understand from them (HELLO Israel wondering for forty years....) This life isn't simply living through happenstance situations...the Lord is sovereign and purposeful. Everything we walk through: difficult or easy, beautiful or seemingly ugly...has purpose to mold us into who we're supposed to be. Even when you walk through a time of rebellion and make mistakes you never thought you would make....Oh the beauty of the Lord restoring and redeeming EVEN THAT time. He will redirect all things to His glory and good purpose.

In nature winter is the time of the most growth. We don't see that. We see a cold, still, white, bleak season and assume Spring is what we're waiting for to see beauty. It is during this seeming stillness, though, that the most growth is taking place underneath the surface. Spring is simply a time for it's debut.

I feel I've been walking through a long winter. One that is just now beginning to let up and reveal the growth thats been happening underneath the surface without my knowledge of it. I'm beginning to see anew who I am and who I am intended to be.

Lord determine each of our steps to fulfill the good plans you've ordained us to walk in and may winters always end with the brilliance and understanding of Spring.

-Katie Ro

Friday, July 1, 2011

Insecurity Makes Me Wanna Vomit

We all struggle with insecurities. They attack us each in different ways and in different intensities; but still, underneath the surface (or roaring loud and clear)...they're there waiting to hinder us. Some insecurities began in childhood and were the result of misunderstanding or mistakes others made at our expense. Others simply develop within new seasons of life. I will have insecurities in the future as a wife and mother that I don't have now and visa versa.

We have ALL been there. We have all left a get together, family dinner, coffee date with a friend, or any other type of communal gathering at some point and found ourselves quoting Baby's infamous "I carried a Watermelon?!?!" line (Dirty Dancing reference). "Why did I say that?" "Why did I do that?" "Do they still want to be my friend?" "Did I seem confident, because I really want to seem confident..." "Did they really get what I was trying to say?" the list goes on and on. There are days and seasons when these questions plague my mind, but praise God there are also seasons when I truly begin to grasp the Lord's unconditional love for me in finding my security in Him. I am not in the latter of these two seasons.

The root of insecurity is finding your worth and joy in external things instead of internal truths. You seek the affirmation of people (both hands raised over here) or you aquire more things to create a pseudo-happiness that lasts until you need another "fix" of affirmation and then a horribly unhealthy cycle begins.

So what do we do? How do we get our anxiety under control when these moments of insecurity consume us?

The only thing we can do...

Take our thoughts captive. Remember that we are called to think upon good and noble things. Remember that we are beautiful, creative, able women who are loved and accepted. Not by everyone in the world (and we have to be okay with that....sometimes I'm not) but by those who get us and ultimately by the Lord. Praise God we are not left to battle insecurity and fear of rejection alone, healing comes, roots are plucked out and nurtured, we grow and accept ourselves and those around us more...
Find hope that seasons pass, they were created to. Nature proclaims that. Praise.

I wish I had some really great background music here and some awesome quotes....I'm tired. Maybe I'll add more later!

-Katie Ro

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

A Whole New World...

So the most adorable world has opened up to me......it is filled with endless possibilities and an opportunity to pretend that you are indeed that sweet little shabby chic hipster you've always longed to be.....

I have been introduced to all sorts of vintage fashion, organic eating, collage creating, etc... blogs and websites lately and they have transformed my days. I am learning to create things I have always been interested in and learning about different aspects of things I've been mildly drawn to but never had the motivation to pursue...it is absolutely fabulous.

Here are a few (I will cite Jamie Lokey for some of these)


Just a few to start with, I dont want to overload you.....

Sunday, June 26, 2011

A Mid-Year Resolution...

I have been so inspired lately as I perused/stalked the blogs of people I know. Some are fun and awesome and quirky, some are intense, emotional, and make you think, others are just filled with the most amazing trinkets and treasures.......

All of that being said, here goes another attempt to remain a consistent blogger. I don't want to assume that people will come by the flocks to read what I have to say or look at the treasures I find, its just that I looooove reading through life events of so many of my friends from so many seasons of life and I want to be able to look back on my own growth and such....plus its really fun....

so..... here goes nothin.....

and a one and a two and a.....